2026 is coming, and I will do a review and summary of 2025. I condensed them into a "Morris's 2025 Life Refinement Manual 50 Tips." These are not clichés, but conclusions you repeatedly collide with in emotions, relationships, values, and growth.

1. Kindness must have thorns. Be sincere, but not an unlimited ATM. Kindness should have a blade; otherwise, it’s just indulgence when others cross your bottom line.

2. The core of relationships is value exchange, not emotional attachment. High-level people give you wisdom, peers give you collaboration, and lower levels only drain your emotions. See what the other person gives you, and you'll know the ceiling of this relationship.

3. Choice is 100 times more important than effort. Effort is worthless if the direction is wrong; love is worthless in the face of reality; ability is worthless in trends. First choose the right people, the right things, the right track, then talk about going all out.

4. Emotions are the most expensive consumables. Time is precious, but emotions are more precious. Save your emotions for those who make you happy and breathe freely; anyone who drains you is a crime against yourself.

5. People come close because of value, and drift away because they are no longer important. Don’t overestimate your position in others’ hearts, nor underestimate the selfish side of human nature. Understand this, and you won’t overreach externally, and it’s easier to reconcile with yourself.

6. The adult social etiquette list after 35: neighbors are not friends; relatives help in emergencies but not in poverty. Discuss money first in cooperation, leave room for help. Be decisive in rejection, be cautious in promises. Don’t vent emotions on family; long-term kindness can become a burden. Sometimes, the truth doesn’t need to be fully spoken; face is always less important than sincerity.

7. Boundaries are the highest form of decency. Choose people who let you be yourself, make you comfortable, don’t require disguise, wish for your success, and don’t try to control you. Everything else: whether you’re there or not, I am still myself.

8. Growth depends on reflection, not just experience. Experience without reflection is just passing clouds. Learn from every setback; otherwise, you’ll suffer bigger losses next time.

9. Keep your sincerity for those who truly cherish you. Sincerity is expensive; don’t waste it on unworthy people. When others give you distance, give them their space; when they cherish you, give them what’s worth it.

10. Accept impermanence to gain freedom. Life is an experience: school, work, marriage, illness, loss, death—all are scenery. Allow regrets, setbacks, and not being liked, to truly live freely.

11. The more someone expresses pain, the more likely they are to be treated gently. Many people don’t want to help you; they just don’t understand how much you hurt. Learn to describe your wounds clearly; sometimes, it’s more effective than crying miserably.

12. Don’t test human nature with your bottom line. Many people aren’t without limits; your bottom line just isn’t low enough to reach their comfort zone. Once you lower yourself to that level, they’ll think, “So you’re like this too.”

13. Truly powerful people never use vulnerability as social currency. Vulnerability is for others to see; strength is for oneself. Those who always complain often end up deceiving themselves.

14. The more you lack, the easier you are to be hijacked. Lack of security → swayed by sweet words; lack of recognition → PUA control; lack of money → pie-in-the-sky promises. Fill your biggest gaps first, and the ropes that bind you will be fewer.

15. The most valuable thing in relationships isn’t giving but retrieving. You give sincerity, time, emotions, and in the end, you have to work twice as hard to get it back. So don’t casually cast it out from the source.

16. Silence can sometimes be the most expensive punishment. No explanation, no reconciliation, no questioning—just block or cold treatment. It throws the other person into an endless loop of “What did I do wrong?” much harsher than scolding.

17. Don’t mistake “being needed” for “being loved.” Many need you to fill their gaps, not because they truly cherish you as a person.

18. Most of an adult’s confidence comes from “having an escape route.” You can quit your job, end relationships, change cities. The more you know you have a way out, the more daring you are to live well in the present.

19. The so-called “for your good” in many people’s mouths is actually for their own good. Control, moral coercion, moral superiority... wrapped up, it becomes “If you don’t listen, you’re unfilial/ungrateful.” Learn to distinguish: is it for your life, or for their face/control?

20. Emotional stability is the highest level of sex appeal. Scarcer than body shape, looks, or money. Someone who remains calm in a storm is a huge safe harbor for those around them.

21. Don’t rush to prove you’re right; sometimes, admitting fault is the biggest counterattack. Acknowledging “I was out of my mind at the time” often makes the other person shut up more than stubbornness, and allows you to retreat with dignity.

22. When you let others be casual with you, they will be casual with you. Boundaries are never automatically respected; they are taught repeatedly through attitude and action.

23. The cruelest truth: most relationships can’t withstand accounting. Once you start calculating who paid more or who loves whom more, it’s already close to ending.

24. Don’t treat temporary emotions as permanent judgments. When feeling emo late at night, don’t make major decisions—delete friends, break up, resign, send a breakup letter... Sleep on it, and most regrets will fade.

25. True maturity turns “Why me?” into “Since it’s me.” The former is a victim mentality; the latter is a controller mentality. Accept reality, and you’ll have the energy to change it.

26. The less you fear being disliked, the easier it is to be liked. People-pleasing traits are most annoying because “I must be liked by everyone.” Let go of this obsession, and you’ll live more relaxed and sophisticated.

27. Don’t mistake others’ testing for genuine needs. Phrases like “If you really care, you will...” are essentially power games, not love. Respond directly: I don’t play this game.

28. In the second half of life, the most valuable asset is “controllable relationships.” Not the more, the better, but the more controllable, the better. Being able to come and go freely, not being emotionally hijacked, mutual respect, mutual growth—these are worth long-term holding.

29. Many people haven’t changed for the worse; you just finally see their true nature. Disappointment often ends not in hatred but in enlightenment: Turns out, you never overestimated them; you underestimated.

30. Allow yourself to love fiercely and be gentle, soft and hard, naive and worldly. No need to be black or white, perfect or imperfect. Being a person with edges but not hurting others is already remarkable.

31. Many so-called “self-change” are just ways to keep deceiving yourself. True change is in actions and choices, not just saying “I’m trying.”

32. Don’t take “understanding you” as a permanent pass. Today’s understanding might turn into just knowing how to use what you understand tomorrow.

33. Truly ending a relationship isn’t a big fight, but when you suddenly lose the desire to explain. When the heart is dead, even the urge to argue is gone.

34. The more someone claims “I’m very Zen,” the more likely they are to break down over small things. Truly Zen people never tell you how Zen they are.

35. The essence of adult socializing is “mutual use + occasional sincerity.” Relationships with no use are almost nonexistent; relationships only based on use don’t last long.

36. The more you treat others as life-saving straws, the more likely you are to be cut by the grass. Saving yourself is the only long-term solution.

37. The hardest thing isn’t rejecting others, but rejecting your past self. “I liked him so much before / trusted him so much, how can I just let go?”—letting go is an upgrade.

38. The most expensive outlet for emotions isn’t venting, but holding in and retaliating. Holding it in too long, the retaliation often harms yourself more.

39. Many people’s pain after breakup isn’t losing the other, but losing the illusion of being loved. The real sadness is “I can’t believe someone like that would treat me this way.”

40. Don’t use your kindness to test others’ bottom line. You’ll lose badly and doubt humanity altogether.

41. Truly capable people never rush to prove “I’m already doing well.” Because they know: time and results will speak for them.

42. The most poisonous three words in relationships: “Let’s talk about it later.” It’s like postponing all responsibility and expectations forever, ending in a mess.

43. How long you allow yourself to be sad determines how far you can go. Infinite emo time is self-punishment; limited emo time is self-healing.

44. The more someone claims “I’m thinking of you,” the more likely they are to turn your life into their script. Gentle control is the hardest to guard against.

45. The best revenge is never making him regret, but making him unable to affect you anymore. Disappear completely—that’s the highest level of presence.

46. In life, the best investment isn’t stocks but your emotional threshold. The steadier your emotions, the more accurate your judgment, the fiercer your decisions, the more valuable your life.

47. Don’t expect others to remember your kindness; they will only remember how you last rejected them. So when it’s time to refuse, don’t be soft.

48. The biggest sign of maturity: finally dare to say no to “good people.” Because you know “good people” can also be just better-packaged consumers.

49. Many times, it’s not that you’re not good enough; it’s that the right person hasn’t appeared yet. But even more cruel: when the right person appears, you’re not yet good enough for them.

50. The last tip: in 2026, be a person who is sharp yet gentle, clear-headed yet willing to gamble, lonely yet warm. Life is only once; if you don’t try to live more like yourself, it’s a real loss.